Moving Mountains, Chasing Stars by Back YiJin

Warning : SPOILERS AHEAD for the Kdrama “Twenty Five Twenty One”

This is the second poem I wrote, the first one was Letting You Go by Na Heedo.

I just finished watching the finale of the Kdrama “Twenty Five Twenty One” and was so heartbroken. Not sure why but it felt like I had broken up with somebody as well. The love story of Na Heedo and Back Yijin was so special and to see them part ways was just painful. I am affected until now, two days after I watched it.  I figured I needed to say goodbye through writing and though of writing a poem of each of their perspectives. So here is the poem I wrote from Back YiJin’s perspective. I used some dialogue from the English subtitle and what I think he thought. This is just my interpretation and I just wrote down the scenes from memory so some sequence may not be accurate.

Back YiJin was a character with a very sad backstory but he became so happy while with Na Heedo. He was caring, gentle, responsible, but was burdened with his family problems and the things he had to do in order to be a good reporter. Nam JooHyuk was great as Back YiJin. One of the reason I watched “Twenty Five Twenty One” was because of him. I liked his character Nam DoSan in “Start-Up”.

I hope I represented what he really thought as I man thinks differently from a woman.

Disclaimer: I am not a professional poet so this poem does not adhere to any literary standard of poems.

MOVING MOUNTAINS, CHASING STARS
by Back YiJin

My youth was happy
I was young, looking forward
To a bright future ahead
I wanted to chase stars
Working at NASA was a dream

But the times were harsh
1998 took away all I had
My dreams, my family, our money
My world was upside down

Who can I turn to?
Why has this happened?
Everyday is a struggle
Making ends meet, being lonely

I grabbed every job available
I had no degree, what can I be?
A comic book store attendant
And a newspaper boy is what I am now

Fate played me a game
I broke a water fountain
A girl called me out
That was weird and awkward

I kept seeing that girl
She seemed lost but brave
I had to save her from that bar
At least a soul less miserable

This girl broke down over a comic book
I thought it was funny
I learned she wanted to be a fencer
It seems she was having a hard time

I always see her and her aura draws me
Reminds me of my youth
When I dared to dream
When my worries were nothing
To what real life really is

Then she saw it, the way they shouted
And blamed me and my family
I was ashamed, embarrassed
But she was nice, showed me somewhere

It was a school faucet
She said it made her happy
And for a moment I was
Forgot my worries, was problem-free

On that tunnel that day
She was my star
Shining so brightly on my life
I never felt that way about anyone

But she was young and I was an adult
I had to be cautious
But to my surprise I became bolder
I wanted to show her my support

We shared happy moments
As we promised we would
One day they attacked my brother
And reality set it again

I chose to run, to stay away
I left our happy bubble
Worked hard away from trouble
Still, I missed her

Checking my voicemails,
I was surprised to hear her voice
My star shining bright
Giving me hope and light

I needed to move on
Find a better opportunity for us
I loved broadcasting class
Could I be a reporter?

Found an ad of UBS
Studied hard to pass that test
Moved back to the city
Could I see her again?

We met again unexpectedly
Then she introduced me to her boyfriend
I laughed it off but deep inside
Jealousy was killing me

Being a sports reporter
Made me always see her
I cheered her from up close
Witnessed her brilliance, see her shine

She called our relationship a rainbow
For a lack of a better word
I had to always protect her
From the harshness of this world

I learned she yearned for an outing
She had never been to one
I set out a plan to make it come true
I gave that summer for you

I never shared my thoughts
But one day I had to say it
It was not rainbow but love
A word too big for her then

A new millennium was on its way
Things were changing and so was she
She was blossoming into a woman
She was bolder than I thought

I saw her lips, I didn't move
She kissed me, it felt good
But I was afraid if I could give her
What she wanted and deserved

I avoided her against my will
Listened to the world's advice
She kept coming to my door
It's so hard to fight myself

When she cried and called my name
I could no longer fight it
Had to kiss her to let her know
She was the most precious girl

I said let's try this kind of love
But what love can I offer?
What promises could I give her?
Maybe it could work, I would give it all

I never thought about hurting people
And it was painful to do so 
My job required me to
A hard pill to swallow

I had hurt Yu-rim
Would Hee-do be next?
I changed departments to protect her
But finding time for her was tougher

I kept breaking my promises
I tried to avoid giving her trouble
And I felt she hated my absence
It gave me pain to see her hurt

I thought work was getting better
But a reporter's job was tough
Seeing other people's misery
Making news out of it

I planned a vacation
To make up for lost time and celebrate
But again the times were fickle
It hurled stones at me once more

The horrors in New York
Gave me nightmares, made me weak
I wanted to keep it together
I wanted us to be together

But how can I?
I am only human
If only I could fly to see her
If only I had another job opportunity

I felt stuck between two mountains
I could neither move any of them
Maybe if I stayed silent
She would hate me and move on

I tried to avoid her still
Avoid her gaze, not to see her pain
That couple luggage was switched
Forcing me to face what I avoided

She wanted to break up
Why on this place I met her?
Again on that special tunnel
She said words that were true

My star, how can I reach you?
You were shining for the world 
I can only see your light from afar
And that may be enough for now

I saw you again with my luggage
Could I take it to say goodbye?
But I had to, we had to
I had hurt you so much

Thank you my love
You were my shining star
In my darkest nights
I was lucky to have your light

If only I had my riches
If only I can give you all you want
My time, my affection, 
But my hands are tied

I knew I could only have you for a while
But I still tried knowing it's futile
I had the privilege of knowing 
A great woman in my life, my starlight.


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Please read "Letting you go", Na HeeDo's perspective here.